shinji, how do i get back the pieces after giving away too much of myself?
if you choose to give yourself away, piece by piece, you have to be willing to let go of those parts of you. instead of looking at those empty spaces as places that you need to fill as soon as possible which leads to things like heartbreak, falling out or into yourself, sadness, and an insurmountable loneliness — instead look at those spaces as places for you to grow into. it’s breathing room. fill them with your breath. it’s very nice to feel light, sometimes. you can always rebuild what you lost, but it’s unfair for you to ask for it back. have the courage to love yourself, fragmented and all. carry yourself with the illusion of wholeness. let other people in. meet people who give you a part of them in return. fill yourself with the world and with people and with human connections and beautiful surreal moments until the inside of you starts to look like a patchwork quilt, like acres and acres of farmland from plane-high altitudes. you can be all the crops you want to be. give yourself away lovingly, selectively. to people you think deserve it. but when you do, don’t be ashamed. don’t want it back. some things only know how to leave. but on the other hand, there are things — love, love, loss, living — that only know how to come in and stay for good.
- Shinji Moon